Relationships are the most vital parts of human lives. The relationship with family members, friends, colleagues, and other relatives form a major part of life. In any relationship be it with parents or love interest, communication is the key. A healthy communication in every relationship leads to fulfillment and happiness. While less and more communication leads to the death of a relationship. In the yesteryear ages, communication was pricey because there was nothing called phone (read smartphone). People waited for letters to arrive to know about the well-being or development of lives miles apart.
With the arrival of the land phone, distance in communication was shortened and people waited for a call, made a call to release their stress, and talked to make someone feel better. But now in this age of extensive communication, sometimes it feels that life was better back then. We all live in a society where everyone is available virtually – the uncle of USA, the aunty of UP – everyone is active on social media. This is a sign of progress for sure but this has also led to some unwanted and unnecessary tensions in relationships.
The friendships or relationships with people was way better and healthier back in those days. For example, in a long distance train, initially in your younger days, you must have met an uncle, aunty, and their kid and shared food, gossiped about the society, gave your opinion about the current political system, etc. and while saying a goodbye perhaps taken their contact number and called them up sometimes! Or at least, you remember the words and laughter exchanged. But now when you look at the railway stations or airports, everyone is either busy on their laptops or mobile phones checking everything through apps, chatting with virtual friends, shopping online, etc.
The barrage of things like Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, etc. have opened many avenues for many people. When taken positively, they help in constructing people but it is definitely taking a toll on personal relationships!
Here are the ways it is affecting our personal space and relationships:
Expecting Unrealistic Goals From Partner
Social Media posts about celebrities tying the knot in a certain way or about other couples who are spending a great time in some exotic locales or seen proposing to each other in some unconventional manner often create a jealousy in mind. You may start expecting these things from your partner too completely forgetting that your significant other loves you, wants you, and cares for you in the way he/she feels ok. Somewhere, you have forgotten to be happy in your way. Because you are busy comparing your life and relationship with what you are seeing “online”. You forget that people tend to show their better version of themselves on these platforms. So, remember that what you and your significant other want from each other are completely different from other couples and that’s why try to be happy in your own world.
The Untiring World Of Showoff
These social media platforms have become a way of “show off” to people in a big way. Initially, people used to show off only in the marriage functions or social get-togethers with their clothes, jewelry, and of course vanity! But now attending these social get-togethers are not so important. In fact, in a marriage function or any other family meet, all of you are seen busy clicking the spread of food, home décor, and a family picture for that perfect #instapost. The real happiness of meeting people, greeting them, and chit-chatting with them can happen only by keeping the phone away. You have forgotten that! Then again there is something called “official” too. Until and unless you upload a happy couple picture on Facebook, the relationship is not validated at all.
There are couples who are facing a challenge in their relationship. But the “social media” posts speak of that perfect love story! Now, if your significant other keep your relationship a secret online, then that also leads to a fight – which shouldn’t be the case! Your relationship should be accepted by you two because the whole world has got nothing to do with it. And pragmatically your social friend circle won’t be there to take care of you in your emotional breakdown.
Privacy Of Relationships
Privacy and social media are like two parallel lines – simply reluctant to meet each other. There are people who keep on posting about their feelings “online” – feeling heartbroken, feeling betrayed, feeling special, feeling disgusting, etc. The couples in a relationship also post something about each other every hour or day. But, hey! Is every aspect of your relationship is for public purview? As said, the whole world has minimum interest peeping into your personal space. And most importantly when you and your partner are facing a tough time, you must deal with it tactfully personally rather than washing your dirty linen in public. The more you post about your relationship ups and downs on social media, the more you become a narcissist, egocentric, and selfish.
And when you are busy posting things about your relationship “online”, then you don’t have that time to invest constructively to your relationship. When you start sharing your personal problems online, some people often tend to be nosy. They keep asking you questions after questions and that would eat up your peace of mind and sanity.
Under Constant Surveillance
Social Media has really crept under the sheets of relationships. Many relationships these days are losing their weight due to the heavy use of social media. See, it is completely ok to check your significant other’s profile, gaze at their new DP, or reading the comments again and again. But what’s not pertinent is to keep a track of whose photos your partner has liked. What has he/she commented on a picture, and where has he/she checked in with how many male and female friends, etc.
Social Media updates about “whereabouts” is getting dangerous this way. You are under constant surveillance of your partner. Liking and commenting on someone else’s picture is not a “lack of trust” and should not bring jealousy in you. Your partner is entitled to have a personal space too. Where he/she can enjoy a drink, chit chat, and food with other friends. And that’s absolutely ok and normal!
So Easy To Trick
Be it Snapchat, Whatsapp, Messenger, Instagram, etc. – messages can be erased with a button. So, people have become smarter in hiding things like embarrassing pictures, naughty messages, and revealing voice notes. So, that ways, you can keep secrets while communicating with people on social media. Social Media gives a platform to connect to people and this is the space where people are often bold and carefree a lot more than their personal life. It is thus very easy to find attention on social media platforms. Even when you are not serious, you can flirt with people and erase the messages later – this commonly happens! People do all these things in social media and hide from their partners. Well, this doesn’t mean that you would now start having a hunch on your partner’s credibility. But do check that you are not doing all these things.
Overall, social media is definitely not going to erase now. It would grow bigger in the upcoming years and that’s why you should iron your ways to use it. While you have started to use social media, obviously you don’t have all these aforesaid intentions in your mind, But this is a web where people often slip. Have clear intentions and conscious because social media alone cannot eat up your relationships, but the way you operate it would kill your relationships. Make it a habit of sitting with your real friends, family members, and relatives without your phone. Because what you share with these people is going to enrich your life and not your social media personality!