It’s difficult for someone to deal with anxiety and it gets even more difficult when someone else has to suffer the consequences. Dating someone with anxiety can be awfully horrible. You cannot help to whom you fall for, but you can choose to fight and stick by each other. Anxiety is like the third person that wriggles in between you & your partner making it difficult for the relationship to thrive. This person constantly sows doubt & confusion. There isn’t anyone out there training you with how to deal with the problems but with understanding anxiety in general can make you connect and love in a new way.
WHAT IS ANXIETY?
Anxiety disorders causes nervousness, fear, apprehension, and worry. These disorders alter how a person processes emotions and behave, also causing physical symptoms. Mild anxiety might be vague and unsettling, while severe anxiety may seriously affect day-to-day living.
Anxiety is a normal and an unpleasant part of life. One where an individual feels worried about the fears. When it comes to relationships, the anxiety is generally about the other person’s behavior & wellness. Certain questions that an anxious person might over think about are:
- What is he doesn’t love me as much as I love him?
- What if he’s lying to me? What if he’s lying to me?
- What if he’s hiding something from me? What if he’s hiding something from me?
- What if he’s cheating on me?
- What if he likes someone else better? What if he likes someone else better?
- What if my anxiety ruins our relationship? (Anxiety about Anxiety)
- What if we break up?
- What if he doesn’t text me back?
- What if I’m always the first one to reach out?
- What if he leaves me?
A lot of you wouldn’t agree because these seems like normal questions that one might think. But trust me when we say its anxiety, this gets pretty deep and intense with each thought. Few of the individuals show extreme caring nature which to an extent is their concern but after that it’s their fear taking over.
If you’re dating someone with anxiety, these are the thoughts that runs through your partner’s brain. And they most likely spend time worrying and ruminating about anything and everything that can possibly go wrong with the relationship.
ANIXETY & IT’S CONSEQUENCES
You might get stressed & agitated with the constant nagging, doubts and confusion but it’s much more than that for that one person. Anxiety is real mental health issue and nothing made up. It is normal, everyone has it but it’s an issue when it’s severe. One cannot imagine about how anxiety can be debilitating illness for one to function a normal life. Situations can make them experience fight or flight reactions and stress about their partner cheating and leaving. An individual suffering with anxiety disorder can over think about the pettiest of things and consequences that can be life threatening. Anxiety doesn’t have a fix cure to it. One’s who have it wish they didn’t have it. They oftentimes feel like a burden on people that they are connected with. There are anxiety-motivated behavior that people experience:
- Anger and irritability
- Being Controlling
- No focus and being distracted
- Avoidant or passive aggressive behavior
5 Tips That Can Help You Deal with Your Partner’s Anxiety
Trying Couple Therapy with Your Partner
When you truly care for someone and you want to encourage them to battle with their stress, trying couples therapy can be a huge help. You can gently guide your partner to see a therapist for it doesn’t harm anyone. The therapist can work on their anxiety as there might be reasons from the relationship as well. Therapy not necessarily has to be for your partner. Couples therapy offers you tasks and issues that you both work on together, making you understand the condition with your partner and for them it makes them stress a little less.
Creating a balance
We often go back and forth assessing over what needs our attention the most; our partner’s attention, ourselves, or the need of the relationship. It’s fulfilling when we fill these needs respectively and accordingly. But when our partner is suffering from something that isn’t going away, we don’t have to ignore our own needs because then with time it gets greater. Balancing the needs accordingly is what is required. You need to work on your own needs that require immediate attention and then your partners. It’s rightly said, set your priorities right! (Not in a negative way)
With that constant fear of losing you, comes the immense need of affirmation that you’ll be there or you’re there. Showing that you care and supporting your partner with the suffering can not only make a difference to them but on the relationship. All they need is for you to be around them. With today’s technology, you can still be around even when you’re not.
Focusing on the positive parts of the relationship can be the biggest attributes of the relationship. Doesn’t matter how your partner is feeling, you don’t have to focus solely on the suffering. That is the time when you need to remind yourself the many reasons why you care for them in the first place.
There’s nothing that a conversation cannot resolve. Talking to them about their fears can make them feel that they’re heard. There’s someone to listen, there’s someone to hold on to. Talking is the first and the foremost way of taking the fears out the mind. And in fact it might make it easy for you to understand what you’re partner’s going through. There are chances that the conversation may not go well but that is when you need to focus on the words and not the gestures & actions. Communication is the key to any relationship. For you, you might be busy but for them, they feel disconnected!
Anxiety doesn’t have to put your relationship in jeopardy. By using the right coping strategies, you can have a healthy relationship and stop anxiety from causing too much stress.